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I was 27 when I married, my husband was 24. We both came from abusive households. We both had intense defense mechanisms. We both handled conflict differently as a result. In a nutshell, I was like you in this way "There's an issue! MUST. FIX. THE. ISSUE! NOW!!! Because the issues me made me feel vulnerable and insecure. My husband was like your wife in that he just shut down. My "fixing" was exhausting him. Making him defensive. Made him feel cornered. We got nowhere fast with that. It wasn't until we could actually HEAR the other's perspective, take it all in and feel what the other was feeling that things changed. Someone had to take the leap of first to get there. In our case, it was me. That leap of was copping to my my emotional baggage without any assurance that he would do the same. I had to slow down and understand that "fixing" takes time. It didn't become an issue overnight and it won't likely get resolved overnight. I had to learn how to not blame too how to him as my partner, not an opponent. How to stop treating arguments with him like we were before a grand jury. And trust. If it's not there, a relationship just won't work. With anyone. Your wife is not handling Ladies seeking sex tonight Axtell Texas things well either. Her defense mechanism is to run away from problems (., emailing/texting an ex) and to emotionally shut down (., "I don't know what I want give me space ") I agree, that's really frustrating to "fix it" personalities like yours and mine I'm glad my post gave you optimism because 20160910 POUVOIR ARGENT SEX ET DISPOSITIF FRANC MAÇONNERIE ET COMMUNAUTÉ FACEBOOK LGBT ALAIN SORAL wife want sex Princeton"> I think you two are just having a communication crisis. Start trying to things from her POV. Start the talk by holding her hand and telling her what you feel your responsibility is in this whole thing. Let her sit with just that, don't demand a response. Let her know you understand you've been pressuring her for a fix and that you stop now. Then stop fixing. Tell her you're sorry for snooping and you stop. Then stop snooping. If she's anything like my husband was, that emotional shut down morph into an emotional vomit. And now, you'll both understand exactly where you stand. If it's really over for her, you'll discover it by doing the above. If it's just a crisis, you'll come out stronger as a couple. My husband and I laugh now after all these years of how we used to be. I wish this for you two also.
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